# JOKE



## phensway (Apr 7, 2003)

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowplow???


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## mechanic (Jan 11, 2003)

phensway said:


> How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowplow???


 This might sound sexist but what the heck
"Hand her the truck key's?"


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## bobme (Feb 17, 2003)

Open it when its drying the dishes?


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

mechanic said:


> phensway said:
> 
> 
> > How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowplow???
> ...


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## MR.FREEZ (Jan 26, 2004)

give her the shovel


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## Peacock (Feb 23, 2004)

LOL


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## ZMonte85 (Nov 23, 2003)

mechanic said:


> phensway said:
> 
> 
> > How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowplow???
> ...










hahahaha


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## pamonster (Jun 26, 2003)

mechanic said:


> phensway said:
> 
> 
> > How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowplow???
> ...


 hahhahahhahhhaha thats so wrong hahhahaaa


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## Death in #'s (Apr 29, 2003)

:laugh: u guys are nuts


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## Neoplasia (Feb 16, 2003)

mr.freez said:


> give her the shovel


 Ditto.







Even if it's wrong I'm goin with that one.


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## Bluegill (Nov 28, 2003)

I thought you were supposed to tie her to the bumper of your truck.


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## Neoplasia (Feb 16, 2003)

I'd rather just giver her the shovel instead of risking her chipping the paint. Trucks are expensive you know.


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## sweet lu (Oct 3, 2003)

Neoplasia said:


> I'd rather just giver her the shovel instead of risking her chipping the paint. Trucks are expensive you know.


 yeah, she might actually make it look better :laugh:


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## AzNP (May 21, 2003)

omg so sexist haha

btw nething would make neo's beat-up truck look better...
chip the paint?? no, more like chip the rust away


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## Bluegill (Nov 28, 2003)

Chipped paint or not, it would be kind of nice to have a maiden haed on your truck like an old sailing ship. Avast ye mateys!


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## Neoplasia (Feb 16, 2003)

AzNP said:


> omg so sexist haha
> 
> btw nething would make neo's beat-up truck look better...
> chip the paint?? no, more like chip the rust away


 I don't even have a truck, and if I did it'd be brand spankin new with a big 'ol diesel in it. That'd take care of the snow in my driveway.


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## phensway (Apr 7, 2003)

give her a shovel is the correct answer!!!!!!!

congrats out to mr freez


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## MR.FREEZ (Jan 26, 2004)

alright i win, thats a pretty good game postin a joke and seein what punch lines

people can come up with i like it can get pretty funny.


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## hays98 (Mar 8, 2003)

why did god make womens feet smaller then mens?


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## phensway (Apr 7, 2003)

no idea, why?


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## Burf (Nov 3, 2003)

so they can get closer to the sink


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## bobme (Feb 17, 2003)

j_burf said:


> so they can get closer to the sink











Chinese womens feet are smaller from history. They used to put thier feet in a wooden box. The family wanted thier woemn to have small so they could be carryed around and never work. Some times their feet where so small they couldnt even walk or stand up


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## Neoplasia (Feb 16, 2003)

bobme said:


> j_burf said:
> 
> 
> > so they can get closer to the sink
> ...


 My sister bought a pair of bound shoes that are almost 200 years old. Somebody actually wore them, you can see how the inside sole has been worn from her feet and water stains from walking. Really creepy.


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

What do you do when your wife comes out of the kitchen?


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## Neoplasia (Feb 16, 2003)

Take the beer and tell her to make you a sandwich.


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

nice, wasnt what i was looking for, but A for effort


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## hays98 (Mar 8, 2003)

j_burf said:


> so they can get closer to the sink


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## sweet lu (Oct 3, 2003)

you guys are funny, why hasnt ms natt responed to this thread?


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## InIndiana (Nov 6, 2003)

redbellyjx said:


> What do you do when your wife comes out of the kitchen?


 Why is she out of the kitchen?


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## sweet lu (Oct 3, 2003)

InIndiana said:


> redbellyjx said:
> 
> 
> > What do you do when your wife comes out of the kitchen?
> ...


 i think you got it man


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

actually the correct response is....

shorten the chain


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## sweet lu (Oct 3, 2003)

redbellyjx said:


> actually the correct response is....
> 
> shorten the chain


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## Neoplasia (Feb 16, 2003)

sweet lu said:


> you guys are funny, why hasnt ms natt responed to this thread?:laugh:


 Because A) she's in the kitchen; or B) these hit too close to home.


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## TimmyTeam (Jun 20, 2003)

Give the bitch a shovel









i love that joke


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## the grinch (Feb 23, 2004)

lmao


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## MR.FREEZ (Jan 26, 2004)

hays98 said:


> why did god make womens feet smaller then mens?


 so they can stand closer to the stove


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## t_h_e_s_a_c_k (Nov 16, 2003)

hahaa this is a funny thread!









Why can't women go skiing?


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## Guest (Mar 29, 2004)

Here's one:

Why do women have legs?


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## Guest (Mar 29, 2004)

Bullsnake said:


> Here's one:
> 
> Why do women have legs?


 So when they walk across the kitchen floor they don't leave a trail like a slug.


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

HA HA HA HA HA


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## t_h_e_s_a_c_k (Nov 16, 2003)

t_h_e_s_a_c_k said:


> hahaa this is a funny thread!
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 There's no snow in the kitchen!


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## Neoplasia (Feb 16, 2003)

t_h_e_s_a_c_k said:


> hahaa this is a funny thread!
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 They'd have to leave the kitchen.


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## Death in #'s (Apr 29, 2003)

:laugh: dam this is turning into such a sexest thread


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## sweet lu (Oct 3, 2003)

Death in # said:


> dam this is turning into such a sexest thread


 i know







but its funny as hell


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## MR.FREEZ (Jan 26, 2004)

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

nothing if she didnt listen the first two times


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

boooo...thats not nice









actually, i heard the punch line as, "Nothing, you ve told her twice"








i heard this joke in reference to scott wieland once


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## phensway (Apr 7, 2003)

lmao....... that was a good one!!!!!!!


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## sweet lu (Oct 3, 2003)

i think this is how it goes,

what does a wife do when she comes back from the abused wives therpy

do the dishes if she knows whats good for her


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## cabbycarny (Jun 30, 2003)

im kinda surprising that there isnt any blonde jokes.....thats what im use to hearing :nod:


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## Neoplasia (Feb 16, 2003)

They aren't offensive enough.


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## Guest (Mar 30, 2004)

cabbycarny said:


> im kinda surprising that there isnt any blonde jokes....


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## Fallenangel0210 (Dec 15, 2003)




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## Ms_Nattereri (Jan 11, 2003)

Fallenangel0210 said:


>


 I concur...










1. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers. 
2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.

3. If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up there.

4. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.

5. Go for younger men. You might as well - they never mature anyway.

6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

7. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

8. Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

9. Best way to get a man to do something - suggest they are too old for it.

10. Love is blind - but marriage is a real eye-opener.

11. If you want a committed man - look in a mental hospital.

12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.

13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.

14. Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at his.

15. Sadly, all men are created equal.


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## Guest (Mar 30, 2004)




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## Guest (Mar 30, 2004)




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## Ms_Nattereri (Jan 11, 2003)

They start out so young..








The Male Brain, sad but true








Proof Men have no logic








More like when most guys talk online


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## 521 1N5 (Apr 25, 2003)

Neoplasia said:


> I don't even have a truck, and if I did it'd be brand spankin new with a big 'ol diesel in it. That'd take care of the snow in my driveway.


 it's okay you don't have a girl either!


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

a hem, ms natt, you stole my personal photo


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## Ms_Nattereri (Jan 11, 2003)

redbellyjx said:


> a hem, ms natt, you stole my personal photo
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 Let me guess the "Horny but Sensitive" one...yeah I loved the hair-do in that one


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

actually the playboy one was me when i was 5.....

nothin much has changed since then


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## Ms_Nattereri (Jan 11, 2003)

5 and still getting potty trained...you poor thing.


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

o shush....

your right, im a pathetic lil man. just look at my post count for the last three days


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## MR.FREEZ (Jan 26, 2004)

what do you call a blonde behind a steering wheel?

an air bag.


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## phensway (Apr 7, 2003)

keep em comin...........


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## MR.FREEZ (Jan 26, 2004)

why did the blonde climb the chain link fence?

to see whats on the other side


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## KumbiaQueens (Feb 5, 2003)

Chinese women didn't put their feet in boxes... they bound them with wrap... It was considered "sexy" to have tiny feet, so each woman tried to decrease the size of her foot, and no, they weren't able to walk much, their toes were positioned on the bottom side of their foot...








That would be the "ideal shoe"... "ideal size" would be between 3-4 inches long, or about 10cm.

If you'd like to learn more about it, go to google.com and type in Chinese Foot Binding... choose a link


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