# Your First Love ...



## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

Well, I thought we were destined to be together forever, I loved her with my heart, she left me.

We dated two years, It is/was my first serious relationship, my first true love.

I don't know if I sound like a bitch about it or not man enough, but f*ck I'm only 19 years old I got lots to learn.

I feel like sh*t, I cry randomly I'm two weeks before my school exams.

I've googled how to get over your first love, because f*ck its tough.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, what else can I do, I want to move on.

We fought all the time over little sh*t, she was never happy but I was happy I had someone to talk to at the end of the day, someone who would listen, someone to talk to.

I feel all kinds of emotions, I spent the night sweating my body out my clothes were drenched, although I was freezing cold it was fucked.

99% of first loves don't work out, and everyone we see had it happen to them, It's just my turn right now...


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## irishfan 689 (Aug 11, 2004)

This is where alcohol comes in and is your best friend


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## Guest (Apr 5, 2010)

irishfan 689 said:


> This is where alcohol comes in and is your best friend


Yes, it was a woman who brought me to drinking,
and I never got a chance to thank her for it.


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## RedneckR0nin (Nov 5, 2008)

Same answers as above and don't want to be a killjoy but in my experience you never get over it. The pain just goes away but the scars remain. That's why this guy don't play that game anymore. If I had to go through that again I would either go nuts, kill her, or both. No thanks and let everyone else think love is wonderful, as personally I think it's a tumor.


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## JoeDizzleMPLS (Nov 5, 2007)

hang out with your buddies and try to go out on a few dates to keep your mind off things, at your age, it should be easy to fill your time with fun stuff


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

I don't plan on drinking until I'm at least in my thirties, my brain is still developing I can't have booze kill what I'm going to make of my career. The feelings just suck bad fellas, It feels like I've been beaten head to toe, the stomach is the best constantly feeling like im gonna yak my guts out.


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## Domelotta (Apr 25, 2007)

Help yourself by journaling. I hate writing but I tried it when a similar thing happened to me. First true love, spent the summer apart after dating 2 years and we both made some mistakes. I was willing to continue, she was not. Afterwards it took me months, but I noticed that writing down all the feelings I had helped. It might not work for everybody, but give it a shot. (I also googled "how to get over someone" like you did lol) I found when I didn't write I built up anger and ended up getting in two fist fights with random people. just my .02.....but I agree with RnR....the scars will remain, just live and learn.


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## theblackduck8907 (Dec 11, 2008)

I agree with RNR. It will feel better with time but them scars, they never go away. Had a similar thing happen to me very beginning of school last year, I spent a long week with my buddy Jack Daniels, then I met some girls started hanging out with them and came through it. Not sayin it happened the next day but just give it time


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## RuthlessCarnage (Apr 1, 2010)

There are plenty of "fish in the sea" and having a lot of "girl" friends you can talk to doesn't hurt either. Working out at the gym is also always a good release it works for me so if the gym is a place where you can just block everything out and feel at peace with yourself than by all means do it.


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## muskielover1 (Dec 7, 2004)

man up!go f*ck some bitches.


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

I can't sleep


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## Sheppard (Jul 8, 2004)

Seriously what you're going through happens to everyone. Well, most of us. There are couples out there who are together their whole lives, but i'm not talking about them in this case.

There's no fast way to get through it or 'over' it. You just have to suck it up and take it. It gets easier though that's for sure. Consider it a milestone in your life.

I was in the same situation 2yrs ago. I dated this girl for 4 years, met her when I was 17. I'm 24 now. She got tired of putting up with me and bounced. It sucked for a long ass time. But eventually I realized I was single and could do whatever the f*ck I wanted, and I did. There's so much awesome stuff you can do when your single dude, seriously it's awesome. It's good to be on your own while your young so you can figure yourself out. I just started partying and being a total whore :laugh: and it felt great.

Anyways i'm done getting all Dr. Phil on you. Go back to crying and eating ice cream







I'm just playin.


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## SERRAPYGO (Feb 4, 2003)

RuthlessCarnage said:


> There are plenty of "fish in the sea" and having a lot of "girl" friends you can talk to doesn't hurt either. Working out at the gym is also always a good release it works for me so if the gym is a place where you can just block everything out and feel at peace with yourself than by all means do it.


Yeah...I agree, sorta..

My ex ditched me after 5 years together for someone else. Your guy friends can take you out, get you drunk and make you immediately forget about it, but...it was my friend's wives and girfriends that really helped me. They were the ones that I could really talk to, and they were the ones that gave me the best emotional support. Guy friends suck and are not cut out for that. They just slap you on the shoulder and offer another drink. It is a form of support I suppose and it helps a little, but, I'll always be grateful to my friend's ex wife who really pulled me through the tough times. Because she's my friend's ex wife, I don't see her much anymore wich is a shame, because I've always wanted to thank her for her help. 
Another thing I did that helped...We lived together for two years, as soon as she moved out I rearranged everything in the apartment. I even repainted the walls. It helped.


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## jamezgt (Jun 24, 2008)

slap that ho 3x


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

I took all the stuff she's got me and tossed it in the trash, I think I'm gonna re-model my room, change everything up. I like how you say to consider it a milestone. There's times where I'm okay with it, and other times where I just feel horrible it's the worst at night trying to fall asleep its when things really kick in. I think right now f*cking another girl would just make me feel worse, I'm still in love with her and I just don't have the mind set to even think of doing something like that. I feel alone, I'm scared, I'm shaking, and I've sweat through 3 shirts in bed already. I really hope it does get better, because this will be the third day, and it just feels like its getting worse.

I'm taking baby steps to man up, I guess I can really call myself a man after I'm done with all of this, and realize that woman are just plain cold and heartless.

It just shows how lacking of emotional support they have, not even last week she told me she wasn't in love with me anymore, hearing that for the millionth time really pissed me off, I left not saying a word just giving her a look. About an hour or 2 later she was begging for me to come back to her house, that "I need you" and all kinds of sh*t. I looked at her and just gave her a kiss saying its alright.

The issue itself is both of us, but in the end she always looks for things to fight about, anything and everything, she itches to start up sh*t over anything, All her friends know it, they just don't bother telling her because she would just explode. On top of it all she's an artist, on a completely different world of her own.

Maybe I just have a big heart, and I'm just being trampled over because of it.

I don't know if she's doing the right thing, but it sucks regardless, either way I'm scarred for life, if we get back or if we don't.


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## Piranha_man (Jan 29, 2005)

Time is the only cure for heartache IMO.


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## b_ack51 (Feb 11, 2003)

Don't worry about it man, sh*t takes time to get over. You'll find someone else, trust me.

Time to get your mind off her:

Find new girl (or boy, whatever tickles your pickle)
Work out
Find new hobbies
Hang out with friends
Study for classes
Classes = more girls and if you're studying, they may ask for help which you can then ask them out
You're 19, you have plenty of time to meet someone better. Especially if you're in college, go out and have fun. DONT WASTE COLLEGE IN A RELATIONSHIP.
Bang as many hot girls as you can when you're young, cause when you get older they won't be around or won't be as hot
There is gonna be another girl and another one after her and another one after her and another one after the one that was after her and then there will be a few you'll forget about cause you were real drunk when you did sleep with them


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## b_ack51 (Feb 11, 2003)

Tdot_Jack said:


> It just shows how lacking of emotional support they have, not even last week she told me she wasn't in love with me anymore, hearing that for the millionth time really pissed me off, I left not saying a word just giving her a look. About an hour or 2 later she was begging for me to come back to her house, that "I need you" and all kinds of sh*t. I looked at her and just gave her a kiss saying its alright.


Bitches be crazy yo. Women don't think logically and if they can warp their minds to make it seem right they will.


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## KrBjostad (Jun 21, 2008)

JoeDizzleMPLS said:


> hang out with your buddies and try to go out on a few dates to keep your mind off things, at your age, it should be easy to fill your time with fun stuff


for sure. surround yourself with friends and find a study group, or a hot tutor.


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## Ibanez247 (Nov 9, 2006)

Yeah everyone goes through this at some point. I have a friend right now thats in his upper 30's goign through this. Im actually about to bitch slap him cause his GF for only 2 years, yes I say only cause 2 years aint nothn, she left him and hes all moping around. Hes also the drummer in my band and since then hes had 2 hot chicks and I mean smoking hot chicks come on to him but he fuckn pushed em away. All the guys in the band give him sh*t. One she was a bitch, she was always bitchn abotu somthing. Wed show up to practice and she would start bitchn cause we were about to make noise and she had a headache. Your dating a Fn drummer wtf! Anyway go out have fun its more than likly going to happen again I can tell you that. ITs over move on. Like everyones sayign go out with friends itll take you mind off things. Think of it this way she obviously doesn care about you so why you cryn over soemone that doesnt give a rats ass. Im assuming she dumped you. If it was the other way around wtf you cryn for your a free man again. That and your only 19 sh*t if this is buggn you that bad you got a long road ahead of you.


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## fishguy1313 (Feb 19, 2007)

Just try not to think about all the fun and guys she is probably having sex with.









I was in your shoes when I was 19-20 years old too, man. I know how it feels. It really does suck. You will eventually find a new chick and fall in love again. Keep your head up.


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## Armand_caribe (Sep 9, 2009)

fishguy1313 said:


> Just try not to think about all the fun and guys she is probably having sex with.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


110% agree with that. Almost all of us have been in your shoes sometime. When you feel really depressed you think there ain't no way out, you feel really terrible just like the worst piece of sh*t... But listen to this pal: There are plenty of woman out there and nothing in life is worthy you spend some of the best times of your life moarning for a woman!!!, no Sir!!!, honest to god I've been there .










This sweety was my girl some time ago and when we broke up I felt really depressed per 3 years, now that I realize how dumb I was to waste three of the best years in my life just like that i wished i could change that but it can't, so honestly I kown it is difficult for you at this moment but listent to our experience, there are plenty of beautiful women out there willing to love you and to be loved you're 19!!!!! oh my godsh i wished i could be your age again you havent even started to live life pal!!! chin up!!!!...


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## shiver905 (May 27, 2009)

RedneckR0nin said:


> Same answers as above and don't want to be a killjoy but in my experience you never get over it. The pain just goes away but the scars remain. That's why this guy don't play that game anymore. If I had to go through that again I would either go nuts, kill her, or both. No thanks and let everyone else think love is wonderful, as personally I think it's a tumor.


Well SAID.
The bright side is. This situation is part of making you a man.
You have to deal with it to get to the next level.
It matures you alot more then you think.


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## the REASON (Jun 18, 2006)

b_ack51 said:


> DONT WASTE _your youth_ IN A RELATIONSHIP.
> Bang as many hot girls as you can when you're young, cause when you get older they won't be around or won't be as hot


end thread.


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## EZmoney (May 13, 2004)

Tdot_Jack said:


> I've googled how to get over your first love, because f*ck its tough.


God bless the internet, how did the world figure sh*t out before the internet?









Anyways, congratz on completing one the steps to becoming a man. It isn't a fun step but it is a rite of passage that everyone must endure.

The first is the hardest, but the good news is that it gets easier after that. 
You are just hitting your prime so this breakup is really a blessing in disguise... you just don't know it yet! 
In a few months, you are gonna think back to this thread and think, "son of a bitch, Pfury was f'n right!!! Life is great!!!"


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## Sheppard (Jul 8, 2004)

EZmoney said:


> I've googled how to get over your first love, because f*ck its tough.


God bless the internet, how did the world figure sh*t out before the internet?









Anyways, congratz on completing one the steps to becoming a man. It isn't a fun step but it is a rite of passage that everyone must endure.

*The first is the hardest, but the good news is that it gets easier after that. 
You are just hitting your prime so this breakup is really a blessing in disguise... you just don't know it yet! 
In a few months, you are gonna think back to this thread and think, "son of a bitch, Pfury was f'n right!!! Life is great!!!"*[/quote]

Now that's real talk


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## pcrose (Mar 9, 2003)

Your young it will happen a lot! It takes time you can't get over it quickly. But try to occupy your mind with school work and reading and what have you. Time heals all. It gets harder with each year you were together it takes longer. So 6 years it theoretically takes almost 3 years to get over. It really depends on the person.


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## Guest (Apr 6, 2010)

Here's what I did after an especially hard break up a couple years back:

1. Cut her out of your life completely.

2. Act like she doesn't exist.

3. Get rid of any kind of memory trigger, especially pictures.

4. Talk to your friends about it.

5. Start to change your cognition - the place where you give things value. A girlfriend is a great support, and it hurts to lose one, but no girl is perfect. Just remember her faults. Remember how awesome you are. Remember *that at anytime, you can change anything about your life*. So if this makes you see yourself differently, change yourself into something you like more. I did all kinds of crazy things after and completely reinvented myself and I am damn glad of it.

6. Hang out with your buddies.

7. Go through a period where you attempt to get laid as often as possible.

Once you have done all of these steps, enough time will have passed where you will likely have had your biological instincts kick in and you will be finding new ladies to be interesting, and that's when you really are starting to heal. At that point, you will be surprised by how your perception has changed and how little meaning that old relationship will hold for you.


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

f*ck guys, this is really helping me out so much, I have points in the day where I don't want to talk to her at all, and then other times where im f*cking dying to just talk to her. I left my removable harddrive in school yesterday, I lost literally 200 hours of work on the semester, which I need for my next 3 weeks. It couldn't have come at a better time. I feel like my heart has just gotten cold. I'm so f*cking angry at all of this.

I come and read this when its completely unbearable,

keep sharing your stories ....

I am eternally grateful to you all.

-Jack


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

I feel better, I talked to a lot of people about it, even a priest. He's the one who I think really hit it through me. I told him how i was in pain and my heart hurt, and he just said instead of thinking with your heart, think with your brain. And the truth is just that, these 2 years I've been using the heart and was far to nice to her.

I'm beginning the process of moving on









It's getting much better.


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## moron (May 26, 2006)

All I can say is fight for what you want and love. If you keep going for her and she keeps neglecting you, you will loose feelings for her and eventually stop caring. As all men, we seek to be the most dominant. You are feeling that way because you feel that there is nothing you can do but you know that you want to do something. You need to take action and see what happens. Talk to her. Every problem can be solved by talking to one another. (If you're both not ignorant, for arguing demonstrates ignorance.) A wise man is patient and demonstrates great understanding. I don't know how bad your situation is but just know that true love never gives up and true love is worth fighting for.

Another thing, don't go all emo trying to beg for her back. A lot of woman leave like that because they're just curious to see if there is anything better out there. (but that's human nature) If you give it some time, she will most likely make an effort to speak with you. You have to use your head and don't make every move.

Just be wise, don't beg, and remember that confidence always win. Hope this helped.


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## Armand_caribe (Sep 9, 2009)

I partially agree. It is good to try to talk with the girlfriend to solve problems and if it is possible to get together again, I mean love worths to fight for it, however there's a thin line where the fight for love ends and starts oneself humiliation and it is very difficult to distinguish it for a lot of people.

You should be very careful and remember the most important person in your life is you... not a woman, nor someone else; care for her but you first have to love yourself and to care for yourself don't you loose your dignity and never beg to a woman. Yeah, I agree that when you utterly love a woman it is fair to make one, two, three tries to fix that up but nothing beyond that. At the end it is just oneself who knows if that beloved woman really loves us or it is just we are on delusion trying to convince ourselves about something it isn't true.

What you have to do is to care about you, fight to come over it and study, work, work out, care for you to show those ones that rejected you that they rejected a winner not a looser and that you're better that ever in every aspect in your life.

Cheers.


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## Nick G (Jul 15, 2007)

b_ack51 said:


> Don't worry about it man, sh*t takes time to get over. You'll find someone else, trust me.
> 
> Time to get your mind off her:
> 
> ...


x200


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## Armand_caribe (Sep 9, 2009)

^^^^+1 :nod:


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

Armand_caribe said:


> I partially agree. It is good to try to talk with the girlfriend to solve problems and if it is possible to get together again, I mean love worths to fight for it, however there's a thin line where the fight for love ends and starts oneself humiliation and it is very difficult to distinguish it for a lot of people.
> 
> You should be very careful and remember the most important person in your life is you... not a woman, nor someone else; care for her but you first have to love yourself and to care for yourself don't you loose your dignity and never beg to a woman. Yeah, I agree that when you utterly love a woman it is fair to make one, two, three tries to fix that up but nothing beyond that. At the end it is just oneself who knows if that beloved woman really loves us or it is just we are on delusion trying to convince ourselves about something it isn't true.
> 
> ...


All of your advice is truly amazing, I don't know whether I should try to win her back or not. She's caused me a lot of pain, I tried talking to her and begging for her to come back the first 2 days, when she didn't reply I stopped. It's been two full days since I last made contact. And I really don't plan on it again.


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## massabsamurai (Mar 12, 2009)

bro i don't exactly know what to tell u but all the advise that has been given above is truly amazing and you should take it. If she comes back, good or else shez not even worth trying or crying over. Hope u get outta this sh*t quickly


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## Wide_Eyed_Wanderer (Aug 22, 2006)

Time heals all emotional wounds. Nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky.


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## Armand_caribe (Sep 9, 2009)

Tdot_Jack said:


> I partially agree. It is good to try to talk with the girlfriend to solve problems and if it is possible to get together again, I mean love worths to fight for it, however there's a thin line where the fight for love ends and starts oneself humiliation and it is very difficult to distinguish it for a lot of people.
> 
> You should be very careful and remember the most important person in your life is you... not a woman, nor someone else; care for her but you first have to love yourself and to care for yourself don't you loose your dignity and never beg to a woman. Yeah, I agree that when you utterly love a woman it is fair to make one, two, three tries to fix that up but nothing beyond that. At the end it is just oneself who knows if that beloved woman really loves us or it is just we are on delusion trying to convince ourselves about something it isn't true.
> 
> ...


All of your advice is truly amazing, I don't know whether I should try to win her back or not. She's caused me a lot of pain, I tried talking to her and begging for her to come back the first 2 days, when she didn't reply I stopped. It's been two full days since I last made contact. And I really don't plan on it again.
[/quote]

Someone told you before in this thread that this kind of issues leave scars that last forever; Such is my case: The love of my life left me as a crippled man I'm emocionally maimed, the pain she caused me was so big and the scars so deep that haven't left me so far which is no good because after many years and some other girlfriends after her, the fact of our breaking up hasn't let me had a healty relationship with the woman that is currently my wife.

My wife is a great woman however I can't tell you I'm the best husband I haven't been able to love her as I loved the other one before, I donno exactly why but It could be related to the love of my life tho and our failed relationship.

When she dumped me after a 3 year relationship I had to be man enough not to go running to her place begging and crying for "another chance" because the way she dumped me was not right, I was the perfect boyfriend and I didnt deserve that, however it doesn't mean inside of me I wanted to go to her place, hold her tight bewteen my arms and tell her that without her my life was incomplete, that without her there was a hollow in my soul that nothing could fill it up... never did that and you know why? Because one have to had dignity and self esteem. Oh yeah, I could have done it, if I had known she had any interest on me however she couldn't care less, I knew.

Even now after 16 years of that, we both happened to meet at facebook some weeks ago where she told me that at some point in the past she felt really bad about what happened and she realized how much I loved her and that feeling had been hurting her for some time. I told her she was the love of my life and also told her not to worry about what had happened cause the past can't be changed and we cannot spend life regreting what we did or didn't do, so just let it go. But to tell true buddy I had to stifle the desire to tell her that after all this time I still love her very much and that hollow in my soul remains and will remain forever cause nothing can fill it but her.

Just to give you and Idea about what does dignity means, I really loved her but I had to respect myself and not drag myself through a puddle of sh*t just because I needed the love of that woman, It doesn't matter how much I loved her, just couldn't and musn't stand the way she was at the end of the relationship.

Good luck.


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## b_ack51 (Feb 11, 2003)

Tdot_Jack said:


> I partially agree. It is good to try to talk with the girlfriend to solve problems and if it is possible to get together again, I mean love worths to fight for it, however there's a thin line where the fight for love ends and starts oneself humiliation and it is very difficult to distinguish it for a lot of people.
> 
> You should be very careful and remember the most important person in your life is you... not a woman, nor someone else; care for her but you first have to love yourself and to care for yourself don't you loose your dignity and never beg to a woman. Yeah, I agree that when you utterly love a woman it is fair to make one, two, three tries to fix that up but nothing beyond that. At the end it is just oneself who knows if that beloved woman really loves us or it is just we are on delusion trying to convince ourselves about something it isn't true.
> 
> ...


All of your advice is truly amazing, I don't know whether I should try to win her back or not. She's caused me a lot of pain, I tried talking to her and begging for her to come back the first 2 days, when she didn't reply I stopped. It's been two full days since I last made contact. And I really don't plan on it again.
[/quote]

Trust me on this man, do not try to win her back. Just go out living your life for yourself, do what you want to do. She'll see that you don't need her to be happy and she'll come begging back. Problem is, with all the fun you're having other hotter women will notice and they'll be on you before she is and you can just tell her, too late fatty i'm with hottie now.


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## assclown (Dec 12, 2005)

irishfan 689 said:


> This is where alcohol comes in and is your best friend


agreed, vodka for me for sure


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## zippa (Apr 29, 2005)

Girls turn 18 every day! Do not try to win her back. Don't even look back. Find yourself another girl or 3 that are much hotter and sweeter. Then you will truely be on the road to recovery. The best cure is the hair of the dog and in this case that's fresh meat!! You are young and have a lot of living left to do so don't waste time on what wasn't meant to be.


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## voyuer (Mar 13, 2010)

sh*t dude your 19 grab a hold of your emotions suck it in its over! she,s soiled property by now anyway relationships are for when your a bit older dont loose your dignaty over this mate as others have said its time to man up drink some beer with your mates and have a laugh


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

I've been sucking it in, shiiatt. Unfortunately the brain sends out chemicals into your blood stream to make me feel this sh*t. I'm taking my own advice, and man it's been so long since i've actually talked to a girl. I have three girls lined up ready to plunge on my dick.

I talked to her for a bit today, said I was gonna try once more and that's it, I called she answered I asked if she wanted to go for a coffee to just talk. She said things are hard as it is, and that we both don't need to feel even worse remembering the good times. She's on her own now, I'm not talking to her again. Deleted her off facebook, deleted all the photos, I'm moving on.


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## EZmoney (May 13, 2004)

Tdot_Jack said:


> I've been sucking it in, shiiatt. Unfortunately the brain sends out chemicals into your blood stream to make me feel this sh*t. I'm taking my own advice, and man it's been so long since i've actually talked to a girl. I have three girls lined up ready to plunge on my dick.
> 
> I talked to her for a bit today, said I was gonna try once more and that's it, I called she answered I asked if she wanted to go for a coffee to just talk. She said things are hard as it is, and that we both don't need to feel even worse remembering the good times. She's on her own now, I'm not talking to her again. Deleted her off facebook, deleted all the photos, I'm moving on.










It's hard to do. WAY TO GO! you are now on the road to recovery!


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

I want to win her back, she was my bestfriend, I love her I know she still loves me, what should I do ...

Everything I do hides the pain for a little and then it comes back twice as worst.


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## b_ack51 (Feb 11, 2003)

Tdot_Jack said:


> I want to win her back, she was my bestfriend, I love her I know she still loves me, what should I do ...
> 
> Everything I do hides the pain for a little and then it comes back twice as worst.


Grow a f*cking set and move on. That's what you need to do. Go out, have fun with OTHER girls and just enjoy life. Honestly man, don't waste your youth in a relationship. "Yay, one girl that'll touch my weiner" when you could be out there looking for multiple girls to fill that role and sometimes two girls will touch your weiner at the sametime.

If you keep thinking about her its gonna hurt more. Yes it hurts alittle thinking you lost something, stop remembering all the good times because you're forgetting about all the bad times you two had. Start remembering how she treated you like crap that one day or how she didn't let you do something that you wanted, then realize you're 19 and girls are super easy in college and that you're better off without her. Trust me in 1 year you'll look back at this thread and laugh at how dumb you were for crying over this one girl.


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## Armand_caribe (Sep 9, 2009)

b_ack51 said:


> I want to win her back, she was my bestfriend, I love her I know she still loves me, what should I do ...
> 
> Everything I do hides the pain for a little and then it comes back twice as worst.


Grow a f*cking set and move on. That's what you need to do. Go out, have fun with OTHER girls and just enjoy life. Honestly man, don't waste your youth in a relationship. "Yay, one girl that'll touch my weiner" when you could be out there looking for multiple girls to fill that role and sometimes two girls will touch your weiner at the sametime.

If you keep thinking about her its gonna hurt more. Yes it hurts alittle thinking you lost something, stop remembering all the good times because you're forgetting about all the bad times you two had. Start remembering how she treated you like crap that one day or how she didn't let you do something that you wanted, *then realize you're 19 and girls are super easy in college and that you're better off without her. Trust me in 1 year you'll look back at this thread and laugh at how dumb you were for crying over this one girl.*
[/quote]

^^^^110% agree...:nod:

C'mon Tdot_Jack as I told you before I know how it hurts and I know it perhaps better than you I've been there as I explained you before in this thread. And now please try to be a man and respect yourself, don't be like all those morons that are dumped by the girlfriend and lose all the sense of dignity, those relationships don't work. Every relationships works on a mutual agreement basis that is when both love at each other not just one part and the other don't...







You'll find a woman who really loves you in the future and you'll see the difference it is just so easy to have a relationship when you are loved you don't need to be forcing things, there' is no begging at all..









...Now squeeze your nuts tightly and try to act as a man for the god's sake!!!!.


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## PELIGROSO PYGO (Aug 27, 2008)

Tdot_Jack said:


> Well, I thought we were destined to be together forever, I loved her with my heart, she left me.
> 
> We dated two years, It is/was my first serious relationship, my first true love.
> 
> ...


 Alright let me give you my opinion.. I been there and my first love I was head over heels for her but the problem with most guys who fall in love for the first time are too vulnerable.. meaning they don't see her breaking it off coming and when it does they don't know how to handle it.. that happened to me, my first love was gorgeous and we're both from Toronto so you know how beautiful the girls are up here.. anywho the best advice I can give you is don't have contact with here online delete her, remove her from your phone and stay away from her, your gonna need your frineds around and go out as much as possible I know its not easy and don't worry about being man enough because we all have feelings no ****.. Mark my words and take this serious, I don't know why she broke up with you 90% of the time its over another guy, happened to me twice, but she WILL try to make contact with you again, it may be a few weeks from now, a few months, or even a year or two, but she WILL try to contact you but its all on you whether you wanna forgive her or not.. My gf now I been with her for 4 years, my ex b4 her was my first love and she called me a year later after she broke it off with me, I told her never to contact me again and to die a painful death, She can never compare to my gf then she hanged up..


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

Alright let me give you my opinion.. I been there and my first love I was head over heels for her *but the problem with most guys who fall in love for the first time are too vulnerable.. meaning they don't see her breaking it off coming and when it does they don't know how to handle it.*. that happened to me, my first love was gorgeous and we're both from Toronto so you know how beautiful the girls are up here.. anywho the best advice I can give you is don't have contact with here online delete her, remove her from your phone and stay away from her, your gonna need your frineds around and go out as much as possible I know its not easy and don't worry about being man enough because we all have feelings no ****.. Mark my words and take this serious, I don't know why she broke up with you 90% of the time its over another guy, happened to me twice, but she WILL try to make contact with you again, it may be a few weeks from now, a few months, or even a year or two, but she WILL try to contact you but its all on you whether you wanna forgive her or not.. My gf now I been with her for 4 years, my ex b4 her was my first love and she called me a year later after she broke it off with me, I told her never to contact me again and to die a painful death, She can never compare to my gf then she hanged up..








[/quote]

I'm exactly in those shoes, sure we fought pointless fights, little ones some big ones, but we always hanged in there. We had a small fight on Saturday and she just exploded saying she can't do this anymore.

It's almost been a week, since then I've hanged with two girls, doing the most randomest things. Last night we hanged out the whole night, till 5aM, just going to parks for coffees and back. I slept so nicely last night it was unbelievable. I honestly couldn't think I could get over how miserable it was. All it really takes is a little companionship, I've forgotten how well I got along with women, but at the same time she's still trailing in the back of my head, moving from the back to the front of my brain randomly during the day.

I sent her one last text this morning, Saying "I love you, enjoy your day", it's the last thing I'm gonna say, I give up and I feel alright about it. I'm sure I only have a few more weeks or so but I should be back to being the happy free man I was before her.

P-fury, You're support really has helped/is helping/ and will help more.

I am very grateful

-Jack


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## zippa (Apr 29, 2005)

If spending time with other women helped then perhaps you should listen to your peers on here and make a habit of keeping other chicks around..


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## moron (May 26, 2006)

edit


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## PirAnhA$p3ciAlisT (Oct 21, 2005)

Don't drink! One of my co-workers just passed away from liver failure due to drinking. Best thing to do is just to hang out with your boys to try to keep your mind off her. I'm usually the heart breaker in my relationships so I wouldn't know what it feels like to be hurt like that.


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## Armand_caribe (Sep 9, 2009)

PirAnhA$p3ciAlisT said:


> Don't drink! One of my co-workers just passed away from liver failure due to drinking. Best thing to do is just to hang out with your boys to try to keep your mind off her. I'm usually the heart breaker in my relationships so I wouldn't know what it feels like to be hurt like that.


You'll come to it man you'll see.......


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

drinking is alright, i went out all day today with the buds and was sloshed the whole bloody day, was a lot of fun Lol. I clipped my friend singing some blues it was pretty funny, I'll put it on youtube to give you guys a laugh.


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## Us And Them (Dec 4, 2008)

It's cool that your hanging out with chicks and all.... But You wanna be the asshole who bangs them and doesn't call . Not the Guy who has to hear about it the next day.

You need to find some f*ck Buddies IMO , start Facebooking ALL those Ho's from Highschool


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## Mattones (Jul 9, 2006)

Jack, How about, NBKK, SYM, Trigga Ja'eh and myself take you out for a beer and make you forget the she devil for the night. ha


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

Sure, I'm down for something like that, I gotta keep myself busy and occupied.

I've started to like one of the girls I'm seeing, and at the same time every passing day gets only a little easier.

Not having the girl I thought I loved not call or text and just delete me like this is working wonders on my brain.
I'm realizing slowly she isn't worth a second of my time again, and even if she did come back I'd give her the boot.

Mornings are still pretty shitty, I think about her the most while lying in bed snoozing, I think I'll change that by changing up my habits and jumping out of bed starting my day when I wake.

I'm recovering fairly quickly I must say, I'm glad I didn't resort to drugs or to much booze, once a week on the night with the guys should be good enough. I'm gonna take it slow with the next girl as I still have feelings for the last and I don't want to compare or do anything out of revenge, it wouldn't be fair for the new girl. She's a real sweetheart


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## Armand_caribe (Sep 9, 2009)

Hey Jack, just in case your new date doesn't come to anything SYM told me he can introduce to his sister....














:laugh:


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## bobme (Feb 17, 2003)

Every guy has their first chick who lets them do every thing to her, then she or he leaves. It happends to every guy once. You learn a lot from her and then you move on.


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## Bawb2u (May 27, 2004)

Armand_caribe said:


> Hey Jack, just in case your new date doesn't come to anything SYM told me he can introduce to his sister....:nod:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


She's the one on the far left. What a cutie!!


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## CuzIsaidSo (Oct 13, 2009)




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## RedneckR0nin (Nov 5, 2008)

Bawb2u said:


> Hey Jack, just in case your new date doesn't come to anything SYM told me he can introduce to his sister....:nod::laugh::laugh:


She's the one on the far left. What a cutie!!









[/quote]


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## Armand_caribe (Sep 9, 2009)




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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

hahaha, she looks like a keeper


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## Wide_Eyed_Wanderer (Aug 22, 2006)

dirka dirka mohamed jihad


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

The anger is all over, so is the sadness, whats remaining are the good thoughts, I miss her today. I just do, I'll get through it but f*ck did I love this girl lol been 8 days now ...


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## Ba20 (Jan 29, 2003)

The heart takes time to heal, My g/f cheated on me when i was on deployment, there is nothing worst than being heartbroke in a war zone. I had other guys that had it happen to them and they were there for me. When we ported in foriegn countries i made sure i had fun. Drank Alot. Came back to the states"virginia" and had all but forgotten her and one day she facebooks me and we hooked back up when i came home"missouri" on leave. Once i got out and returned home we hooked back up and now live together and have a beautiful daughter. The feelings arent really the same or as strong as they used to be but if its ment to be things will work out just dont try and force it. As stated earlier you might meet someone, look back, and thing wow i was dumb. Garth brooks has a song called unanswered prayers that you should listen to this will sum it all up. Good Luck brother.


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

almost been 2 weeks since we've seen each other, or talked to each other, things are much better







I feel free I feel alive

I realized how she put almost no effort into us, and she just didn't want to period, it's alright and I'm really happy it turned out like this.

Better earlier than later, it could have been worse, children, house split up, she just wasn't for me, plenty of fish in the sea


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## theblackduck8907 (Dec 11, 2008)

Tdot_Jack said:


> almost been 2 weeks since we've seen each other, or talked to each other, things are much better
> 
> 
> 
> ...


You only go around once, so may as well have fun. Now just get out there and enjoy the single life.


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

A little wisdom I jotted down;

Disappeared like a ghost, a ghost with no soul
no heart for another, but only her own
The pain inside, justifies the right out
the deeper she slips, the colder it gets
the feeling once big and bright
diminishes at the speed of light
And that right there is my story to you, I loved this girl more than the moon, she shined on me like the sun in the skies, but with every breath the stars eventually die, she kissed me sweet with every peck, I still feel alive right then and there, She was one of a kind, but not kind to her one, she took out my heart and broke it well, she took it for a stroll she gave it a flare, sang to me it left nightmares, but now it's all done and I'm free to say, I loved her dearly but it won't stay that way, life is simple its bitter sweet, it shows you a bit of good and sweeps you off your feet, it disappears and then your fucked, you look around with no one there, you cry you weep, for a few days you even can't sleep, but eventually you get right back up, you notice sh*t, you noticed how it was fucked, you argued over little sh*t, and the more you realize, the easier it gets, the feelings disappear like the polish president, and that's the way life is, changes are just part of the whole biz, the world doesn't stop for someone like you, the world just spins while we pick up our clues, one giant puzzle waiting to be solved, piece by piece we work at our lives, gluing together what we perceive as right, the older you get the more knowledge you gain, you'll learn your whole life until your strolling with your Cain

~Jack


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## Wide_Eyed_Wanderer (Aug 22, 2006)

^^^


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## massabsamurai (Mar 12, 2009)

Tdot_Jack said:


> A little wisdom I jotted down;
> 
> Disappeared like a ghost, a ghost with no soul
> no heart for another, but only her own
> ...


bro thats some deep and funny sh*t but unfortunately its the reality :/


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

I think I'm at my breaking point, at this stage the choice is either fight for her or let her go, both seem so right I really don't know which to choose. Her birthday is on the 22nd and I'm debating whether to text her happy bday, we haven't talked in 2 weeks now, perhaps not texting will really shed her some light on the whole situation and how I'm not there for her.

THOUGHTS ?

Today has been filled with no hate, It's probably the most intense day I've missed her yet.


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## Wide_Eyed_Wanderer (Aug 22, 2006)

I feel for you Jack. I know all about that breaking point feeling because I have been there. I broke up with a girl that I have known since the ninth grade last summer and it was hell. All of my friends used to treat their girlfriends like dirt and only talk about how much they banged them, and I would go along with that, but I never mentioned the feelings of love, caring, tenderness, and warmth to my buddies for fear of being call a gay. It sucked man, but it sucked more than my buddies only viewed their Gfs as sexual objects. Also this girl was rare, she never drank or smoked, it was good times. We would take our dogs to the woods and just walk them for hours and talk. I would steal my dads jeep in the wee hours of the morning and we would just hang out. It sucks because you feel like you will never have these times again.

When we broke up man it felt like there were lighting strikes inside of my chest that used to keep me up at night. I would often dream of ways to make her understand my pain. The feeling was horrible almost as if their were clouds of sulfur everywhere, bombs where dropping everywhere, almost as if it was heartbreak warfare. All of intoxicants that I have done in my life was nothing compared to how high this girls love used to get me.

Hold the one you love close to you, the one you love, and not the one that simply has sex with you.


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## b_ack51 (Feb 11, 2003)

dont text her.


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## FEEFA (Nov 19, 2007)

b_ack51 said:


> dont text her.


I agree just move on


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## Armand_caribe (Sep 9, 2009)

Tdot_Jack said:


> I think I'm at my breaking point, at this stage the choice is either fight for her or let her go, both seem so right I really don't know which to choose. Her birthday is on the 22nd and I'm debating whether to text her happy bday, we haven't talked in 2 weeks now, perhaps not texting will really shed her some light on the whole situation and how I'm not there for her.
> 
> THOUGHTS ?
> 
> Today has been filled with no hate, It's probably the most intense day I've missed her yet.


C'mon Jack, let her go.... I know it hurts you gotta be strong and.... read my lips...LET HER GO... SHE AIN'T WORTHY. thrust me, as time passes by and you are 30 years old you gonna be dating sweety pies from 22 to 28 and at that time she gonna be 32, then when you are 35 you gonna be dating sweety pies from 22-32 she gonna be 37, she's gonna feel old compared to the sweeties you will be dating mate. Then some day you gonna cross in front of her with one of those young hot chick that i have told you and her old fat ass is gonna fking regret having left you, that'll be your revenge, chin up mate.

Cheers.


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## massabsamurai (Mar 12, 2009)

^ thats the best advice anyone will give you mate







its hard to let go but surround urself with ur friends and other people and live ur life dude!


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

Well I learned from the mistakes I made, I was way to nice to her when at times I should have been a complete f*cking ass, Nice guys just get walked on and now I firmly understand why girls date guys that treat them like sh*t.

I forgave way to easily and freely,

A vulnerable boy I was blinding by some bitch that stomped on my heart all the time.

I was ready to work at us till the end LoL

The biggest slap in the face, I can finally just suck it in after almost 3 weeks and really view it for what it was.

Waste Girl

Time to move on

Thank you all for sharing your wisdom of life


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## Devon Amazon (Apr 3, 2005)

Armand_caribe said:


> I think I'm at my breaking point, at this stage the choice is either fight for her or let her go, both seem so right I really don't know which to choose. Her birthday is on the 22nd and I'm debating whether to text her happy bday, we haven't talked in 2 weeks now, perhaps not texting will really shed her some light on the whole situation and how I'm not there for her.
> 
> THOUGHTS ?
> 
> Today has been filled with no hate, It's probably the most intense day I've missed her yet.


C'mon Jack, let her go.... I know it hurts you gotta be strong and.... read my lips...LET HER GO... SHE AIN'T WORTHY. thrust me, as time passes by and you are 30 years old you gonna be dating sweety pies from 22 to 28 and at that time she gonna be 32, then when you are 35 you gonna be dating sweety pies from 22-32 she gonna be 37, she's gonna feel old compared to the sweeties you will be dating mate. Then some day you gonna cross in front of her with one of those young hot chick that i have told you and her old fat ass is gonna fking regret having left you, that'll be your revenge, chin up mate.

Cheers.
[/quote]
The man from mexico speaks the truth!


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## Wide_Eyed_Wanderer (Aug 22, 2006)

Im happy your moving on Jack. This girl can finally go back to her usual day job and routine now (Sucking Dicks).


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## PELIGROSO PYGO (Aug 27, 2008)

Tdot_Jack said:


> Well I learned from the mistakes I made, I was way to nice to her when at times I should have been a complete f*cking ass, Nice guys just get walked on and now I firmly understand why girls date guys that treat them like sh*t.
> 
> I forgave way to easily and freely,
> 
> ...


This topic is still going on! Hey bro Whats up? I can see that your letting it all out there and finally come to terms and see what it is that went wrong but don't bring yourself down because truth of the matter is YOU DIDN'T DO NOTHING WRONG!! Don't blaim yourself for anything because you were nice and treated her the way a man should and she went and broke your heart? f*ck that man, listen bro ALL GIRLS are the same its just about balance, thats all there is to it.. I can relate with you because you'd think they want a nice guy but you can't let p*ssy control its alot to take in but you'll understand, your at the beginning stages.. don't give too much, don't give too little just enough thet makes them want more. I know you wanna get over her but me being in your shoes before I know how badly you want to get back with her.. but why make the effort with a person who won't make the effort with you? You keep posting updates of how long its been but you don't move on from someone that fast it just ain't possible, you need at least three or four months till you can really start thinking straight.. Try not to talk about her, if I were you I wouldn't text her but thats your decision.. You need to let her know that your taking charge because if you keep talking to her, or you still say you love her shes gonna see that and be like I'm still in control, Hes always gonna be there no matter what I do.. Don't let her think that, Be in control and try not to show any emotion. Be as cold as she was... OMG Tdot_Jack never wished me happy bday!!! I can't believe its been 7 days since my bday and he didn't text me? or call me? Does he have a gf? You gotta put yourself in her shoes and really think how she would feel. Thats what you want her chasing you and not the other way around. We're both from Toronto so I'm here to help you, If you need any advice man just ask I'm here.. add me on hotmail - [email protected]


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

speakyourmind said:


> Im happy your moving on Jack. This girl can finally go back to her usual day job and routine now (Sucking Dicks).


Lol, I was her first kiss and first everything but sure, I wouldn't even care if she did that all, wasted girl added to the books of waste.

It's time to find a real woman, or let her find me









@PYGO, I haven't called or texted for 2 weeks, and I don't plan on it again.
You're most definitely right, I outdid myself all the time, I'm happy we dated, and I'm happy I learned this much after the end. It feels like I just took a Life Exam and passed with flying colors. Its time to tackle the next girl


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## jamezgt (Jun 24, 2008)

Probably going to take a couple of months to REALLY get over her. If I were you I'd find a rebound, or a fling just to get your mind off of her. Two years is a long time, so occupy yourself with something (or someone) and you'll eventually get over her. It was probably one of the hardest things I've had to do, but everything happens for a reason (((


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

I felt pretty shitty yesterday at night, I knew she was having a birthday party and all, it felt like I was outcasted from society and she was in control over it. None-the-less I didn't text her yesterday and as much as I do love her I'm making steps towards moving on, its not easy but it gets easier every passing day. The last few weeks have been tough f*ck, I'm sure the worst has past and now its just the process of falling out of love. I'm ready to accept the fact that this will take months, if not a year.


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

3 weeks since the break up, it still pains me that she hasn't tried to make contact at all, I have so many questions I want answered but I probably never will


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## theblackduck8907 (Dec 11, 2008)

Yeah I was in the same boat 2 years ago. We dated for a year and 8 months and the first weekend I was back at college I found out on facebook that she was cheating on me, and then she broke up with me in a text. I spent a week with my friend Jack Daniels and all my buddies, got over her and under someone new. She didn't talk to me for four months, only when her new guy cheated on her did she want to talk to me. I still don't have the answers to my questions but f*ck her, she lost a great thing and realized it too damn late.

It's gonna take time but eventually it will get better, just keep hanging out with your buds and some girls and she will be gone before you know it


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

Been one full calender month now, and a lot has changed emotionally wise since that first week, The heart does not hurt as much and the river of nightmares flowing through my blood has diminished. It still hurts thinking back to that first week but with time I'm sure it won't even have an effect anymore. I dream about her every other night or so but its mainly good memories. I miss her at times but I'm getting by fairly decently. I should be okay within the next month or two.


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

Lol, to update everyone since its been a while, the first month breaking up was complete sh*t but I learned a lot so I'm glad I experienced it. The 2nd month we were separated I wouldn't text her at all and she would text me every other day lol. by then I had an amazinggggg rebound girl, I told her my whole story and she just smiled and said I'll take care of you and she did !!!! to cut things short we got back together after about 2 months being separated, we've been much happier now and going stronger 3 months now ! I appreciated the comfort I got from people sharing their stories/experiences here. Looks like things turned out alright, now I know they always will-


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## His Majesty (Apr 5, 2005)

wait so you got back together with the original chick? or with this new rebound chick?


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## Bawb2u (May 27, 2004)

His Majesty said:


> wait so you got back together with the original chick? or with this new rebound chick?


He's back with the first chick again. How long until the next emo post? Should we start a pool?


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## Piranha Dan (Nov 11, 2007)

The first one's always the hardest but you'll get over it. I went through the same thing several times around that age. Turns out it was for the best, because over the next 10 years I realized I wasn't the settling down type. Still single, still loving it and probably will be for life.


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## Guest (Aug 29, 2010)

Bawb2u said:


> wait so you got back together with the original chick? or with this new rebound chick?


He's back with the first chick again. How long until the next emo post? Should we start a pool?
[/quote]

It will come sometime within the next year.

The love-dovey phase only lasts so long.


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## Sacrifice (Sep 24, 2006)

Oh man been there done that. It's tough not wanting to get back together after those 2 months. Be careful my friend. I was engaged to a girl after 4yrs of dating and then all of a sudden it was over and I moved 500 miles away just to get away from her. I went through the same things for about 5-6months then out of the blue she starts emailing me, telling me how she loves me and wants to be with me again. She even jumped on a plane and flew out to see me for the weekend. Of course it was all sunshine and gumdrops while she was there, but a few weeks after she returned home she decided that it was wasnt working about again, LOL. So we ended it.

MAN am I glad that we did, I ended up meeting the most amazing girl and now we're engaged to get married in May of 2011. I honestly hope that things work between you 2 but I'm leaning towards that it won't. If you 2 were fighting all the time eventually it will start up again, trust me it always does. I know it's normal for couples to argue but man it doesn't have to be over stupid little things all the time. You'll find the right person some day, whether its this girl or the next.

Enjoy your youth man (this coming from a 25yr old, lol) and try your best to always communicate how you feel to this girl and maybe, just maybe it'll work this time around. Good luck my friend.


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## Tdot_Jack (Nov 16, 2009)

Bawb2u said:


> wait so you got back together with the original chick? or with this new rebound chick?


He's back with the first chick again. How long until the next emo post? Should we start a pool?
[/quote]

lmao, you were right broke up 5 months after we got back together Oct 23- 30 of 2010

Found a new girlfriend 2 months after its almost been a year and yeah whoever said the next girl will be nicer was right It's a great relationship and we have no problems zero conflict about anything

Karmas a bitch? It's pretty insane how much I feel I've changed since 18 to now 21


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## Piranha-Freak101 (Dec 8, 2010)

Like omg omg omg !!! /grabs tissues and ice cream


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## TRIG (Jun 1, 2011)

lol^. But for real man, I'm happy for you. I'm having a bit of girl issues myself, damn, they can me some difficult creatures to understand.


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## bob351 (Oct 23, 2005)

Well your for a bit of luck...


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## Bawb2u (May 27, 2004)

If that's your chick on the right, she's too old.


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