# Jokes that offend!



## Piran-huhs? (Jul 23, 2003)

1.Q: What is better than winning a medal at the Special
Olympics?
A: Not being retarded

2. Q: What's blue and fucks old people?
A: Hypothermia

3. Q: What's the first thing a woman does when she gets out
of the battered wives' shelter?
A: The dishes, if she knows what's good for her

4. Q: How do you swat 200 flies at one time
A: Hit an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan.

5. Q: What is the definition of "making love"?
A: Something a woman does while a guy is f*cking her.

6. Q: What do 54,000 abused woman every year have in common?
A: They don't f*cking listen.

7. Q: What's yellow and green and eats nuts?
A: Gonorrhoea

8. Q: Why did God create yeast infections?
A: So women would know what it's like to live with an
irritating c*nt once in a while too.

9. Q. How can you tell a macho woman?
A. She rolls her own tampons.

10. Q. Why do **** like ribbed condoms?
A. Better traction in the mud.

11. Q. What's the difference between a woman and a sheep?
A. The sheep doesn't get upset if you screw her sister.

12. Q. What's the difference between acne and a Michael
Jackson?
A. Acne usually doesn't come on a kid's face until he's at
least 13 years old.

13. Q. How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
A. Marry it.

14. Q. What do you get when you cross two black people?
A. Your ass kicked.

15. Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a
hooker?
A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

16. Q. Why do men pay more for car insurance?
A. Because women don't get blow jobs while they're driving.

17. Q. What's the difference between mayonnaise &semen?
A. Mayonnaise doesn't hit the back of a girl's throat at
thirty miles an hour.

18. Q. Why do women call it PMS?
A. Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

19. Q. What's a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in
your new car.

20. Q. What's the height of conceit?
A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

21. Q. What's the definition of macho?
A. Jogging home from your own vasectomy.

22. Q. How can you tell if you're at a bulimic bachelor
party?
A. The cake jumps out of the girl.

23. Q. What's the difference between oral sex &anal sex?
A. Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak.

24. Q. How is pubic hair like parsley?
A. You push it to the side before you start eating.

25. Q. What's so good about an Ethiopian blowjob?
A. You know she'll swallow.

26. Q. Why don't they teach driver's education and sex
education on the same day in Iraq?
A. They don't want to wear out the camel.

27. Q. What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a
Jewish wife?

A. A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewellery.

28. Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf
ball?
A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

29. Q. How do the little boys at Michael Jackson's ranch
know when it is bedtime?
A. When the big hand touches the little hand...

30. Q. How do you know when it's time to wash dishes and
clean the house?
A. Look inside your pants; if you have a penis, it's not
time.

31. Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?
A. They spray paint X's on the back of the animals that
kick.

32. Q. Why is divorce so expensive?
A. Because it's worth it


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## Guest (Dec 9, 2003)

haha some of those are great :laugh:


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## Genin (Feb 4, 2003)

those are great.

Joe


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## Piran-huhs? (Jul 23, 2003)

i must apologize ahead of time to the moderators of this forum!!! Sorry Xenon, Ms_Nattereri, thePACK, Serrapygo!!!
























Please don't BAN ME!!!


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## crazyklown89 (Aug 28, 2003)

> 10. Q. Why do **** like ribbed condoms?
> A. Better traction in the mud.
> 
> 11. Q. What's the difference between a woman and a sheep?
> ...


























and that michael and acne is f*cking funny


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## Ms_Nattereri (Jan 11, 2003)

For the ones I read, theyre not a bann-able offense. However, Im against those sexist ones











> 6. Q: What do 54,000 abused woman every year have in common?
> A: They don't f*cking listen.


But that one is just out-right wrong!


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## Xenon (Nov 15, 2002)




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## Piran-huhs? (Jul 23, 2003)

Ms_Nattereri said:


> For the ones I read, theyre not a bann-able offense. However, Im against those sexist ones
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 I'm sorry Karen ...


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## CrabJuice (Sep 27, 2003)

I like number 5...
thats just what I needed after work


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## CraigStables (Oct 5, 2003)

Ms_Nattereri said:


> > 6. Q: What do 54,000 abused woman every year have in common?
> > A: They don't f*cking listen.
> 
> 
> But that one is just out-right wrong!


 I didnt find that one too funny either to be honest....

...just true!


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## Judazzz (Jan 13, 2003)

:laugh:

Some may be on the edge, but still:


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## Winkyee (Feb 17, 2003)




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## Kory (Jun 5, 2003)




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## sweet lu (Oct 3, 2003)

good ineed good jokes.

man those are gonna last for day

great as usaul


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## Red Eyes (Nov 25, 2003)

Some Good ones!!!!


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## ~SUNshine~ (Nov 6, 2003)

Ya a lot were funny but a bit too sexist for my liking......


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## plonker_from_mars (May 1, 2003)

LOL, they wer funny


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## boxer (Sep 11, 2003)

Piran-huhs? said:


> 3. Q: What's the first thing a woman does when she gets out
> of the battered wives' shelter?
> A: The dishes, if she knows what's good for her
> 
> ...


omg too funny, im loving #6

i'm so sorry but im so bad.


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## SLANTED (Dec 7, 2003)

Sweet jokes piran-huh. Here's one:

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?
Answer: Christopher Walkin

I know, it's damn wrong


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## tinyteeth (Mar 12, 2003)

Q: Why did God create yeast infections?
A: So women would know what it's like to live with an
irritating c*nt once in a while too.
hahaha


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## jahnke31 (Dec 4, 2003)

man those are rude! but funny!!!


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## pamonster (Jun 26, 2003)

:laugh:


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## kouma (Sep 1, 2003)

some I didn't get, but overall a little to much I think for a piranha site-even if under The Lounge


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## AzNP (May 21, 2003)

yo wutsup wit the ethiopian jokes i dont get ..
someone fill me in

the rest r great


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## BoomerSub (Jun 23, 2003)

AzNP said:


> yo wutsup wit the ethiopian jokes i dont get ..
> someone fill me in


 There was a severe famine in Ethiopia in 1984 and 1985, ~1,000,000 people died. Images like this one sparked a massive world-wide relief effort. See this link for more information.

-PK


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## MikeH. (Sep 22, 2003)

They were all awsome.


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## STIFFY (Jul 9, 2003)

I liked that last one


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## tecknik (Jul 18, 2003)




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## camotekid (Sep 21, 2003)

Piran-huhs? said:


> 13. Q. How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
> A. Marry it.


 this one rocks!


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## hungryboi (Jun 6, 2003)

i think reading 23 was the first time i cracked up in front of my comp other than from a flash meg or AIM


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## 14_blast (Oct 6, 2003)




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## caazi (Jul 28, 2003)

Even if they are sexist, they are jokes, they aren't meant to actually mean something.


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## Bigkrup444 (Oct 6, 2003)

They are offensive but who cares they are funy as hell!!


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## Lyle (Jan 29, 2003)

Some are kinda messed up though...not that I mind or anything...


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## Death in #'s (Apr 29, 2003)

:laugh: dam those are great


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## fishofury (May 10, 2003)




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## BUMPKIN (Nov 7, 2003)

they rock


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