# MY STUPID A*S COUSIN!!!



## Scrap5000 (Mar 4, 2005)

Just called me...what a dumbass. He was driving on I-87 in upstate NY earlier today, and like a dipsh*t he picked up a 20-sumthin year old DIRTBAG who's car had broken down, instead of just letting the guy use his phone to call for help.

Turns out the kid had a duffel bag with him, so my cousin was trying to make small talk with the kid and asked him where he was going & stuff, and when he asked him what was in the bag, he says the kid got all weird & just told him don't worry about it. Now, if that was me or you, wouldn't you just either drop it, or drop the kid? No way in hell would I let a hitch hiker in my ride to begin with, but right there he should have known sumthin was up...

But noooooo, he has to be the wise-*ss that he's always been & asked the kid again, and again the pr*ck tells him don't worry about it. Three or four times this went on, always the kid telling him don't worry about it, and getting weirder & weirder each time. Man, f that!!

Finally I guess the kid got fed up and told my cousin to just let him out. So my cousin pulls over, lets him out, and the stupid b*stard that he is, he grabs the kid's bag and speeds off with it!!

10 minutes later 4 state troopers caught up to him & busted his a*s with the bag. He's in deep sh*t, man. And he's so f'n stupid that he tells me all of this over the phone from jail, you know those lines are recorded.

I gotta go see him & bail him out once his brother picks me up, I don't even know how that works...and it's Friday night?! Monday then??

Anyways, let this be a lesson to everyone: DON'T PICK UP A HITCH HIKER!!!


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## Jewelz (Feb 24, 2004)

What was in the bag ?

That reminds me of that scene in "There's something about Mary" - hitchhiker talking about "6 minute abs" with a body in the duffel bag


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## bob351 (Oct 23, 2005)

so what was in the bag this is a cliffhanger


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## werdna (Mar 15, 2005)

OH MY GOSH









i think i heard about this


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## QWERTY1830 (Jul 26, 2006)

Alot of good drugs thats whats in the bag


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## Wide_Eyed_Wanderer (Aug 22, 2006)

what was in the bag?

Come on thats like the only interesting part of this story.


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## ChilDawg (Apr 30, 2006)

Really? The lesson is to not pick up hitchhikers? I seem to see another lesson that is much more poignantly emphasized by this story!


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## b_ack51 (Feb 11, 2003)

I thought the moral of the story would be "don't steal". But yes, what the f*ck was in the duffel bag. I'm guessing womens panties.

Anyone else want to guess?


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## Wide_Eyed_Wanderer (Aug 22, 2006)

a mini skirt, lepoard print blouse, lipstick, mascara, high heels, business cards.


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## Jewelz (Feb 24, 2004)

Fido


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## Sheppard (Jul 8, 2004)

It was a bag of puppies

View attachment 124565


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## ChilDawg (Apr 30, 2006)

b_ack51 said:


> I thought the moral of the story would be "don't steal". But yes, what the f*ck was in the duffel bag. I'm guessing womens panties.
> 
> Anyone else want to guess?


That's the moral I saw.

What's in the bag can't be all that illegal unless the hitchhiker was really, really stupid and called the cops on his stash or something like that.


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## pyrokingbrand (Nov 30, 2004)

This is killin me, first off, WHATS IN THE BAG, secondly how did he get pulled over?

CONTENTS OF BAG (my guess):

DRUGS
GUNS
SANTAS PRESENTS
MONEY
cant be good whatever it is!

Either way good luck SCRAP!!


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## b_ack51 (Feb 11, 2003)

Jewelz said:


> Fido


We could only wish.


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## Dawgz (Aug 18, 2005)

a bag of pirayas

or snakeheads....lol

bag of ....crap?


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## Scrap5000 (Mar 4, 2005)

WHAT WAS IN THE BAG?? DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT!!!!
























Sorry guys, couldn't resist...


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## Wide_Eyed_Wanderer (Aug 22, 2006)

come on man


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## stonecoldsteveostin (Nov 15, 2003)

probably went trick or treating a few days early and kept all of his candy in the bag


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## mike123 (Jul 17, 2006)

my guess was it was a huge bag of weed.


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## taylorhedrich (Mar 2, 2005)

mike123 said:


> my guess was it was a huge bag of weed.


Yeah, probably just marijuana or something.


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## 911 (Jun 30, 2006)

scrap5000, come on if your going to tell us such a tempting story you gotta finish it or keep us updated.

your cousin is crazy man


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## Snake_Eyes (Jun 14, 2006)

A head?


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## diddye (Feb 22, 2004)

my guess is thats the point of the story....he wont tell us cuz its fake. Must've got this in a forward? If it was true you'd probably tell us what it is in the first post. Good one! You got us fooled.


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## mykil73g (Aug 28, 2004)

diddye said:


> my guess is thats the point of the story....he wont tell us cuz its fake. Must've got this in a forward? If it was true you'd probably tell us what it is in the first post. Good one! You got us fooled.


ditto.


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## taylorhedrich (Mar 2, 2005)

Snake_Eyes said:


> A head?


That would be a worst case scenario.


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## Snake_Eyes (Jun 14, 2006)

taylorhedrich said:


> A head?


That would be a worst case scenario.








[/quote]
Sorry I watched Se7en a few days ago.


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## Scrap5000 (Mar 4, 2005)

LOL...guys, I said "Don't worry about it!!" lol...sorry, it was too good to not post it!


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## bob351 (Oct 23, 2005)

what was in ittttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt


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## 911 (Jun 30, 2006)

hes a tricker

no one is that stupid


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## MONGO  (Feb 7, 2006)

Dont pick up hitchhikers is so true..just watch There's Something About Mary








Step into my office...Why?...Cuz your f*ckin fired!!


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## acestro (Jul 7, 2003)

I heard this joke here recently. It's kinda funny, I guess...

Funniest part of the hitchhiker in Something about Mary...

http://www.reelwavs.com/movies/theres_some...aboutmary33.wav



Jewelz said:


> Fido


I about lost it right here.


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## PinKragon (Dec 28, 2005)

I didnt get it


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## Leasure1 (Jul 24, 2006)

<not understanding>

is this just a joke, or did it really happen?

WTF is in the bag, cuz I am worried about it.


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## Guest (Oct 28, 2006)




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## C0Rey (Jan 7, 2006)

Leasure1 said:


> <not understanding>
> 
> is this just a joke, or did it really happen?
> 
> WTF is in the bag, cuz I am worried about it.


was the bag for you perhaps?

this thread sux

unthill we get to know the content of the bag


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## MONGO  (Feb 7, 2006)

C0Rey said:


> <not understanding>
> 
> is this just a joke, or did it really happen?
> 
> WTF is in the bag, cuz I am worried about it.


was the bag for you perhaps?

this thread sux

unthill we get to know the content of the bag









[/quote]

its the ringer


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## lastgreengarden (Sep 13, 2006)

damn bad storytellers not telling what whats in the bag


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## snakehead rock (Mar 26, 2006)

Wait..... it was...... probably a gun of somekind. Guy probably bought it and didnt have a listens and went shooting wit some friends when his car broke down.Maybe weed. If it were crack or sh*t like that then i bet it would not so be so easy as to just bail him out.


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## mike123 (Jul 17, 2006)

Snake_Eyes said:


> A head?


That would be a worst case scenario.








[/quote]
Sorry I watched Se7en a few days ago.








[/quote]
i love that movie


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## armac (Nov 28, 2002)

THis story has nothing to do with "Do not pick up hitchhikers' It should be called "Do not Steal"

Anybody that dumb needs to be in jail


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## benJii (Feb 17, 2005)

Bullsnake said:


>


QFTMFT


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## Dairy Whip (Mar 26, 2006)

for 1. theres nothing wrong with picking up hitchhikers the proublem is your cuzzens an idot for taking the bag luckey little sh*t he didnt get shot buy that guy..........should have been!!!!!
2. your an idot for tellin us the story and leavin out the only part ppl were reading the story to hear!! Dairy


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## redbellyjx © (Jan 26, 2004)

guys its a joke...

notice in the story how the cousin kept asking whats in the bag... wahts in the bag... whats in the bag....

the point is for all you to keep saying "whats in the bag"


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## taylorhedrich (Mar 2, 2005)

redbellyjx © said:


> guys its a joke...
> 
> notice in the story how the cousin kept asking whats in the bag... wahts in the bag... whats in the bag....
> 
> the point is for all you to keep saying "whats in the bag"


If that's the case then it's a pretty stupid joke...


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## Guest (Oct 29, 2006)




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## Guest (Oct 29, 2006)




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## Leasure1 (Jul 24, 2006)

had everyone going though didn't he!!!


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## Guest (Oct 29, 2006)




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## C0Rey (Jan 7, 2006)

BAN


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## cueball (May 24, 2005)

number 1 if and i mean if you feel the kneed to pick a lost bro up or someone that is in need,, do it its legal here in nova scotia ...
number 2 i dont get the whole last part of the tail ,,,your couz stold the bros bag????WHY because he was the nosiey ,,,,in the real world dude that would never happen if a dude is jumpy thay you are gettin nosiey he welll be protecting that bag with all hes worth and for shure if its got a load of the sticky icky in it. 
and number 3 why did your couz get a call from state troopers ,,,,,?

now come on put a little more time in to your lies bro,,,,,you almost sucked me in to this one....


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## Devon Amazon (Apr 3, 2005)

*JESUS SAVES*
_This thread_


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## cueball (May 24, 2005)

ha ha only on sunday mon


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## Devon Amazon (Apr 3, 2005)




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## taylorhedrich (Mar 2, 2005)

Nice pictures Devon.


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## C0Rey (Jan 7, 2006)

this ones my favorite, in my sig btw


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## Devon Amazon (Apr 3, 2005)

C0Rey said:


> this ones my favorite, in my sig btw










who knew religion could be so much fun


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## MONGO  (Feb 7, 2006)

at pictures


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## Guest (Oct 29, 2006)

Instead of going to church, this is what I spend my Sunday morning doing. lol- glad I switched religons.


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## Devon Amazon (Apr 3, 2005)

Bullsnake said:


> Instead of going to church, this is what I spend my Sunday morning doing. lol- glad I switched religons.


Genius


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## Jewelz (Feb 24, 2004)

Those pics are great, but shouldn't they be in 1000 derailments thread ?


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## Devon Amazon (Apr 3, 2005)

Jewelz said:


> Those pics are great, but shouldn't they be in 1000 derailments thread ?


probably


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## thebluyak (Apr 14, 2006)

Devon Amazon said:


> *JESUS SAVES*
> _This thread_


you know that person directly to the left of jesus is mary magadiline right?


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## Devon Amazon (Apr 3, 2005)

thebluyak said:


> *JESUS SAVES*
> _This thread_


you know that person directly to the left of jesus is mary magadiline right?
[/quote]
Yes i have read the da vinci code :nod:


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## Scrap5000 (Mar 4, 2005)

OMFG, I got a pm right away from ONE person who knew it was a joke, and pretty much the rest of y'all didn't even catch the punch line when it was laid out plain as day. Sheeesh


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## BlackSunshine (Mar 28, 2006)

hahahahahahahahahahahah 
Nice one!


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## MONGO  (Feb 7, 2006)




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## Guest (Oct 30, 2006)

Scrap5000 said:


> OMFG, I got a pm right away from ONE person who knew it was a joke, and pretty much the rest of y'all didn't even catch the punch line when it was laid out plain as day. Sheeesh


I got it, but it was more fun to bust your chops and pretend nobody got your joke.









So, what was in the bag afterall?


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## joey'd (Oct 26, 2005)

RockinTimbz said:


> <not understanding>
> 
> is this just a joke, or did it really happen?
> 
> WTF is in the bag, cuz I am worried about it.


was the bag for you perhaps?

this thread sux

unthill we get to know the content of the bag









[/quote]

its the ringer









[/quote]
this aggression will not stand man, the dude wil not stand for this aggression


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## thebluyak (Apr 14, 2006)




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